Mom of Fame – Morayma

Getting to know different kinds of moms is really the best. Whether meeting them in person or online, we learn something new with each interview. Morayma is single mom doing it all on her own. Mom to a teenage boy and preteen girl, things can be overwhelming. After reading her answers we have a new perspective on how raising children into teenage years can be.

We can all relate to so many of her answers. How hard it really is to be a mom, but how overwhelming wonderful it is at the same time.

Please help us welcome Morayma into our Mom of Fame! Please be sure to check out her blog, Adulthood Rewired (think healthy living, parenting, and life as an adult)!

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Please tell us a little about yourself and your family.

I’m a single mom of two great kids living in Los Angeles. My daughter is 11 and just started middle school, and my son is 14 and will start high school next year. My life revolves around redefining myself as a woman and in my career post-divorce, and my kids…so it’s a lot of ballet lessons, soccer practice, Fortnite, and slime making!

I worked as a fashion model for 15 years before having my kids. After I had my son I couldn’t bear to leave him to travel for work, so I started my freelance writing career. I write content for different clients ranging from medical to fashion and everything in between. I am also a substitute teacher. About 5 months ago, I decided that I really wanted to be able to start writing for myself, and started my blog, Adulthood Rewired (www.adulthoodrewired.com). I’m having a lot of fun writing it and learning how to be an effective blogger. I write about healthy living, parenting, and life as an adult in general….how we are all just trying to figure things out from one day to the next!

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

Now that my kids are both in middle school and growing faster by the minute, I think the best piece of advice I was given was to “enjoy every minute of it”. Despite the sleepless nights, and toddler tantrums, I really wish I would’ve really enjoyed those years and those moments more and stressed out less. I wish I would’ve not worried so much about whether or not I was doing things “right” and just been in the moment. My kids are typical tween/teens now and love doing stuff on their own or with friends, and I miss having them around and cuddling up all the time…I feel like they grew up from one day to the next. Bittersweet. I would definitely give another mom the same advice. Just to slow down and enjoy every phase and stage [even the difficult ones] because someday they would miss it. All of it!

How is motherhood different than you thought it would be?

It’s A LOT harder than I thought it would be, and I didn’t think it was going to be easy to begin with! My son had some health challenges when he was a toddler which was very difficult to go through. It was also a learning experience to realize that what works for one child may not work for another…and that sometimes no matter what you do, your kids will still sometimes act out, make bad decisions, etc, and you have to let them stumble and fall and pick themselves back up. It’s hard not wanting to always make everything “ok” for them. My mom was a nanny so I grew up around babies and kids my entire life. I thought I had it in the bag, but having your own kids is a game changer. All of a sudden everything you thought you knew about raising kids goes out the window! It’s definitely a challenge, but so worth it.

What are your 3 strengths when it comes to motherhood?

I am and always have been very consistent when it comes to bedtimes, so my kids have always been great sleepers, on schedule, and well rested. Early to bed and no issues in the morning getting up. (Wish I could say the same about how they get ready for school in the mornings though! haha!)

I’m an avid researcher and have learned a lot about holistic health and natural remedies which have helped my kids and I stay as healthy as possible even during cold and flu season! My kids are so used to it that they were taking teaspoons of cod liver oil when they were little with no issues!

I’m an old fashioned mom in a lot of ways, which my kids may not appreciate now, but I like to think it’s a strength. At 11 and 14 they still don’t have cell phones, they have chores, they have earlier bedtimes than most of their friends…that type of thing. I don’t believe in raising entitled kids, and I try my hardest as a single mom to make sure they grow up to be respectful, and grateful. This is hard especially with my son, since I do think having a strong father figure in the home is so important especially for headstrong boys like mine is….but I do my best and hope at least some of it sticks.

Describe a time when you were completely overwhelmed as a mother?

It’s a toss up. When my son was little he had a reaction to a medication that caused some long lasting side effects. I was devastated and spent a few years researching and trying to find a way to recover him. Thankfully I was able to with the help of some amazing integrative doctors, but the stress and lack of sleep from worrying so much was incredibly overwhelming. Now, I am overwhelmed because it is so hard for me to feel like I know what I am doing….the teen years are an incredible challenge with him. Some days are great, but other days I feel completely at a loss.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

In a lot of ways I feel like I lost my sense of identity. For 11 years I was a stay at home mom and wife. I stopped working and never really took any “me time”. After the divorce I had to figure out how to make ends meet and had to hit the ground running. I had to find myself again and learn to rely on only myself. Three years later and I am still struggling but staying strong. Always a work in progress. I have gained patience and a perspective in life that you just don’t have when you are not a parent. I have also gained the ability to love more than I ever thought possible.

What do you want your children to learn from you?

I want them to learn that I love them but am not perfect. That I will make mistakes, but we all do. I want them to learn to be strong, and independent, and to take on challenges head on. I want them to be happy, and never settle for less than they deserve. I want them to learn that you don’t need material things to be happy, and to always be kind.

Family Friendly Events Around Metro Detroit for Fall 2018

We all know that fall in Michigan is the best time of the year. The leaves are changing, football is on, weather is cool and there are plenty of family friendly events to do on the weekends. With the official day of fall just on the horizon, we thought we would put together a list of events going on around the metro Detroit area in October. Fall fun, friendly Halloween events and cider mills. What’s better?! Let us know what your must for the fall is!

Things to Do:

October 2nd

What: Hay Day
Where: Heritage Park in Farmington Hills
Details: Hay! Check out these unbe-leaf-able activities: hayrides, pumpkin painting, hiking, bouncing on the bounce house, touring the Fire Department’s fire tuck, roasting marshmallows and hot dogs over Farmington Hills largest camp fire, and watching the trees change color. Food, hayrides, and other items will be available for purchase. FREE ADMISSION

October 5th – 21st

What: Zoo Boo

Zoo Boo 2017

Where: Detroit Zoo
Details: The Detroit Zoo’s annual “merry-not-scary” event has been re-imagined to bring even more Halloween excitement to your family! Zoo Boo will be held on the evenings of October 5-7, October 12-14 and October 19-21, between 5 and 8 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays; Sunday hours are from 3 to 7 p.m.

October 6th

What: Mommy/Daddy and Me – Monster Mugs
Where: Creative Arts Studio in Royal Oak
Details: Scoop up your little monster and come make a memory at our Monster Mug Mommy/Daddy and Me class. We’ll read a monster story and then use hand prints and sponges to create a monster design on a coffee mug. After the class, our talented custom artists will add details and your child’s name finish of your personalized masterpiece.

What: Ferndale Fall Festival
Where: Detroit Curling Club
Details: 2018 entertainment and activities include – hayrides, pony ride, carnival games, face painting, inflatable bouncers, trick-or-treating, pumpkin painting, music, arts and crafts, photo station and more!

October 7th 

What: Fall Color Walk
Where: Heritage Park in Farmington Hills
Details: Experience the magic of the season! Take a guided hike under a canopy of color through Heritage Park. Discover why and how leaves change color in the fall, and search for animals preparing for winter. Please dress for the weather.

What: Harvest Happening – Fall Festival
Where: Hess-Hathaway Park in Waterford
Details: Come out and enjoy fall at the farm during our 32nd Annual Harvest Happening Fall Festival!

What: Clawson Fall Festival

Lions Tailgates are a Fall Essential

Where: Clawson City Park
Details: Celebrate the beginning of fall with an afternoon of fun with the Parks & Rec Department! The day includes free hayrides, farm animals, free inflatables (don’t forget your socks) and baked goods for sale. The day ends with a bonfire conducted by the Clawson Fire Department. Car show information can be found at unitedstreetmachines.com, proceeds will benefit Veteran’s Food Pantry. Also enjoy the Second Annual Donut Dash 5K and Taste of the Town, contact 248-435-6500 if you are interested in those events.

October 8th

What: Family Fall Fest
Where: Troy Farm
Details: Local food/craft vendors, face painting, inflatables, games, and more. For more info, call 248-524-3484

October 10th 

What: Smashing Pumpkins
Where: Detroit Zoo
Details: Detroit Zoo animals will have a smashing good time on Wednesday, October 10, and Saturday, October 20, when they receive pumpkins filled with tasty treats to eat, play with, roll around in, tear apart and smash.

Each year around Halloween, Detroit Zoological Society staff provide the animals with seasonal munchies – including pumpkins, gourds, cornstalks and other fall harvest goodies – as part of its comprehensive program of ensuring environments for animals that are ever changing and appropriately complex.

October 12th-28th

What: Hallowe’en at Greenfield Village
Where: Greenfield Village
Details: Stroll down streets and alleys haunted by lavishly costumed characters during America’s most spooktacular Hallowe’en event. Follow a mile long, curving path illuminated by the flickering light of over 1,000 hand-carved jack-o’-lanterns. This is a kid-friendly, nightmare-free Hallowe’en gathering. We regret there can be no refunds or exchanges, even in the event of inclement weather as determined by The Henry Ford in cooperation with local emergency services.

October 13th 

What: Stone Wall Pumpkin Festival
Where: Rochester Hills Museum/Van Hoosen Farm
Details: The Rochester Hills Museum at Van Hoosen Farm will host its signature event – the Stone Wall Pumpkin Festival on Saturday, October 13 from 10:00 – 4:00 p.m. Activities during the day include entertainment, music, food for purchase, and more! Guests are invited to carve a pumpkin and place it on the stone walls surrounding the Museum property and return that evening to see all the pumpkins lit up! The Museum is hoping to exceed their record of 1,011 pumpkins glowing at one time. In addition, an outdoor exhibit of scarecrows made by local organizations will be on display. The Museum will provide stencils and carving tools but guests are encouraged to bring their own carving tools from home. Evening lighting of the pumpkins runs from 7:00 – 9:00 p.m.

October 20th

What: Halloween Hoot
Where: Dinosaur Hill Nature Preserve in Rochester, MI
Details:  Bring your little ghosts and goblins for a spooktacular Halloween tradition. This is Dinosaur Hill’s favorite fundraiser and proceeds go to support our programming!

Groups will gather in the nature center to create a spooky-fun craft, then head out on the mood-lit trails to participate in a series of short, funny, interactive skits while collecting treats along the way.

Complete your evening with a doughnut and cup of cider around the campfire with live entertainment. You can even let your little monster loose to have fun at our mini-fair with Halloween themed carnival games…all included with your ticket.

Tickets sell for a specific time with groups leaving every ten minutes. Times will sell out so don’t delay. $8 per person. Registration Required, follow the handy-dandy link:
https://www.dinosaurhill.org/event-3028906

October 22nd

What: Trick or Treat Among the Trees

Troy Nature Center in the Fall

Where: Troy Nature Center
Details: A fun and friendly outdoor celebration for kids ages 3-9. Costumed kids are welcome to hike the woodland pumpkin trail with a SNC guide. Children will learn the secrets of the forest and receive treats and meet costumed characters. Fee is $13. Call 248-688-9703 to register.

October 27th 

What: Streets of Treats (Family Halloween Event)
Where: Downtown Northville
Details: Kids’ Costume Parade begins at the Northville Community Center, 303 West Main Street, at 9:30am and walks into downtown, with a special parade escort by Preservation Dental’s Tooth Fairy. Main and Center Street businesses will be open to trick or treaters as the Parade of Costumes walks into Northville till 11:30am, with some additional treat stations and activities. The event is free and sponsored by the Chamber, NCBA, DDA, and others.

What: Trick or Treasure
Where: Downtown Clawson
Details: Kids in costume will travel through the downtown businesses collecting allergy-free treats and maybe a few tricks along the way! Find more information about this Downtown Development Authority (DDA) event at downtownclawson.com!

October 28th

What: Halloween Feed the Hungry Celebration
Where: The Village of Rochester Hills
Details: The annual Halloween Party! We are asking participants to donate either $5 per child.

What: Halloween Hoot
Where: Beverly Park in Beverly Hills
Details: All children living in Beverly Hills are welcome to join in the festivities. For more information go to the Beverly Park homepage.

What: Birmingham Pumpkin Patch & Halloween Parade
Where: Shain Park in Birmingham
Details: Head to the annual Pumpkin Patch from 1 p.m. – 4 p.m. for children’s activities and live entertainment. Dress your children in their Halloween costumes and let the fun begin! The Pumpkin Patch event is hosted by the Junior League of Birmingham. Stick around to march in the annual Birmingham Halloween Parade hosted by the Birmingham Bloomfield Chamber at 4 p.m. at the corner of Bates and Martin near Shain Park. Cider and seasonal treats will be served after the parade.

What: Trick or Treat in the Village
Where: Troy Historic Village
Details: Wear your Halloween costume and tour the grounds as you collect tasty treats and make a craft to take home. Call for $$$ info and to register – 248-524-3570.

October 30th

What: Troy Police Halloween Safety Bash
Where: Troy Police Department
Details: The Troy Police Department will be joined by the Troy Fire Department and Department of Public Works for a trunk-or-treat event. Safety lights will be distributed to children in attendance. Troy PD asks you pre-register for this FREE event HERE.

 Cider Mills:

Who doesn’t love a good outing to the Cider Mill on a nice chilly day? Here is a list (not complete) of cider mills around the metro Detroit area. See one missing? What’s your favorite?!

Rochester Cider Mill

 

1. Blake’s Orchard (17985 Armada Center Rd., Armada)
2. Erwin Orchards and Cider Mill (61475 Silver Lake Rd., South Lyon)
3. Franklin Cider Mill (7450 Franklin Rd., Bloomfield Hills)
4. Long Family Orchard & Cider Mill (1540 E. Commerce Rd., Commerce Twp.)
5. Miller’s Big Red Apple Orchard (4900 32 Mile Rd., Washington)
6. Paint Creek Cider Mill (4480 Orion Rd., Rochester)
7. Parmenter’s Cider Mill (714 Baseline Rd., Northville)
8. Rochester Cider Mill (5125 Rochester Rd., Rochester)
9. Spicer Orchards and Cider Mill (10411 Clyde Rd., Fenton)
10. Three Cedars Cider Mill (7897 Six Mile Rd., Northville)
11. Yates Cider Mill (1990 E. Avon Rd., Rochester Hills)

Mom of Fame – Alicja

Alicja’s interview came to us at the perfect time; not only were we dedicating a month to interviews with mom bloggers, but we were also hoping to get more interviews with “veteran” moms to give us some much needed guidance.  She has 10 years of motherhood experience under her belt, and you can definitely tell from her answers. She candidly speaks about taking time for yourself (by reminding us that, “happy mommy raises happy children.”), how being a mom is a privilege, and the importance of having a supportive partner (and acknowledging that support by mentioning him in this very interview).

Please help us welcome Alicja into our Mom of Fame! Also, be sure to check out her blog, Just Redefine, it’s now one of our favorites!

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Please tell us a little about yourself and your family.

I am a wife and mom of three little bombs of energy (my boys are 9 and 4 years old and princess will be two very soon). Besides that, I am a housewife with two diplomas in the drawer and recently a blogger. I’ve made it a mission of mine to encourage other moms to live the full, successful lives they dream about no matter of the size of chaos around them. I am very happy to connect to all the moms reading momfaming blog!

 

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

I’m pretty sure every mom got that advice: when your baby sleeps, you should sleep. I’ve heard various reactions to that. I decided to not treat that literary but understood it as a “when there’s a moment that baby doesn’t need you, it’s your moment for self-care”. There were times when I actually napped but also read books or simply watched TV. Rarely I used that time to catch up on household chores. Thanks to that I was able to take care of my kids with a smile, without the feeling I’m losing my mind. I’m telling this to all my pregnant friends. Happy mommy raises happy children. At this hard, early stage your child will definitely not remember the mess at home, but there’s a chance s/he will remember mama’s smile.

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

When I had my first son, I was sure I knew everything I needed to know. I learned how to take care of the baby from my mom when she had my much younger brother. I was finishing my master’s in psychology, I read so much on the subject, that I was feeling almost overprepared. Plus, I hoped some maternal instinct will kick in and guide me. How silly of me 😉 Even though I knew the technical stuff, how to bathe him and so on, everything else was so surprising. The fact that I could spend my days just watching him, the amount of love and worry that I felt every single day, the magic patience that I showed when he was crying (I still don’t know where it came from and where did it go after my third baby). Everything was different than I imagined.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

What a great question. Every mom should answer this to her self!  First of all, I see treating my kids as a priority as my greatest strength. It makes adjusting my whole life to their needs easy and natural. This also affects my next point – as a mom I became good at organizing our family life [so that] way we’re not going crazy. I can handle both: controlling everyday chaos and unplanned last-minute events. I’m also quite proud of the contact I have with my kids, they know they can always talk to me about everything and anything. Not to mention, I am able to persuade them to tell me everything I want to know with my charming, easy going way 😉

Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

I call it the dark times. I was depressed sometime after having the third child. I felt it’s not really post-partum depression, I just lost myself. Connect that to what I said earlier about my children being my priority and it’s easy to see how scared and guilty I felt that my state of mind may affect my family. I must admit that I still am figuring out what was going on with me, I’m waiting for the moment I’ll be able to joke about it. I was completely overwhelmed with all the roles I’m supposed to play on top of fighting my own problems at the moment.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

Becoming a mother is a privilege and a mission. Ask any woman who tries for years to get pregnant. I made a choice to have children. By doing so, I needed to give up a couple of things, but I don’t see it as losing anything. Even when I felt lost, like I mentioned above, it was never about being a mother. The honorable mention goes here to my husband, who is extremely helpful and supportive. He is the originator of my “just redefine” philosophy that I now share on my blog. I’ve definitely changed since I’m a mom. I’ve gained a new identity, a new purpose. From the 10-year perspective, I must say I was an excellent decision.

What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?

Another excellent question! I hope they will observe and learn how to create a relationship with their spouses based on unconditional love, trust and partnership. I want them to know how loved they are and how important it is for them to invest in their own kids. I’m talking about time, engagement, not only money. If they got that, I am happy. All the rest will fall into places.

Mom of Fame – Sapna

When Sapna reached out and said that she was interested in being interviewed we were so excited. Not only does she have an amazing blog, but she also expressed how much she loves what we’re doing with our blog (flattery will get you everywhere, obviously!). Once we read Sapna’s answers we were even more excited. Each of her answers are so thoughtful and helpful to moms everywhere. She has such a unique perspective of motherhood from raising her three children in several different states, while also making sure to keep them aware of her Indian culture and her husband’s southern traditions.

As always, we are so thankful to be able to welcome Sapna into our Mom of Fame. Please leave her some love and help her realize how much she deserves to be there! Also be sure to check out her blog by clicking on the link below!

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Tell us a little about yourself and your family.

Hey y’all! My name is Sapna and I’m a pharmacist turned stay at home mom of 3 beautiful, smart kiddos. I grew up in Atlanta, GA, but my parents are of Indian descent. They moved to America shortly after they were married to provide a better life for my brother and I. I consider myself to be Southern as I have spent the majority of my life living in Georgia. However, my parents did a great job instilling Indian values and culture in me. My husband is actually Caucasian, which makes our children mixed. It’s important to me that I pass on to my children the values and culture of my Indian heritage, as well as the Southern traditions of my husband’s family and my childhood. I recently started a blog about what its like raising half-white, half-asian children in America. I write about everyday mom issues, tips and tricks, and resources for helping Indian Americans raise their children. I also added a sort of book club as I’m an avid reader, and I’m working on lots of yummy recipes coming soon! Check it out at www.southerndesimommy.com, and follow me on Facebook!

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

The advice to “ignore what everyone thinks motherhood should look like and just do it your way” was the best advice I’ve ever received. It’s easy to get all flustered and feel like your failing when all you see around you are so called stepford moms with their perfect bodies and perfect babies, who have all their ducks in a row. For me, motherhood is far from that. With my 3 crazy kiddos we take things one day at a time, but we always have fun! Our house is a mess, and I haven’t brushed my hair in a week. We hit up the gym regularly, and I try to make sure we do at least one fun kids activity daily. My advice to you is to just focus on what makes you and your family happy and healthy – that’s what’s most important.

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

Motherhood is a lot lonelier than I imagined. I guess I figured all moms were somehow automatically great friends, but it turns out that’s not the case. We have moved multiple times since having children, in fact, all 3 of our children are born in different states. It’s been really tough trying to meet other moms who have kids of similar ages and to connect with them socially. Being a working mom with my first 2 kids made it even harder. After my 3rd child was born, I was able to stay at home with the kids, which has given me so much more time to interact with moms groups and go on play dates, etc. I’m still working on it, but I think I’ve finally found a group of great ladies I can relate to 🙂

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

1. I’m a planner and I like to be prepared. I plan our meals, play dates and activities for the kids, and I always have snacks/drinks in my van and on my person. Hell hath no fury like a hungry toddler.

2. I’m good at going with the flow. When our plans are interrupted by some unforeseen complication, I’m pretty chill. I stay calm so the kids stay calm while we think of a way to solve the issue at hand and get our day back on track. Problem solving is an important skill I want to teach my kids. It’s imperative that they learn to handle a “bump in the road” because life in the real world is full of them!

3. I love my children, unconditionally and with all my heart. No matter how crazy they make me or how many times they’ve had to go in time out, at the end of the day I make sure they know that they are loved no matter what.

Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

When my second daughter was born we had just moved to a new state. It was December and we now lived in Wisconsin. We hardly knew anyone there, and had no support system. Being new to the crazy winters of the north, stuck inside with a 2 yo and a newborn, plus postpartum depression made for a terrible combination. I also had to return to my full time job after just 6 weeks. I felt so guilty dropping my girls off with a nanny while my husband and I went off to work. It turns out the nanny was horrible, and my newborn developed positional plagiocephaly from being left on her back all day. Thankfully we were able to get a bazillion second opinions and it turned out she did not require surgery. It was a ridiculously stressful time. I cried, ate my feelings, and cried some more. I survived, but I’m now convinced that hell is cold, dark, and lonely – not unlike the winters of Wisconsin – no offense to all you northerners out there 🙂

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

Oh my, I have lost my body, my mind, my sleep, and all personal space – I can’t even go to the bathroom alone, haha! But in return I have gained endless love and joy, and oh so much laughter! My kids are my reason for living and I’m so thankful to them for reminding me of all the little things in life that are so precious. I cherish all the moments we’ve shared and the memories we’ve made over the years.

What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?

I hope my children learn to love unconditionally and to be kind to others. I strive to make love and kindness a priority in my life and I hope that they will see that and learn from it. In this day and age what they say is true, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love.”

If you would like to read more about the struggles of raising bi-lingual kids check out Sapna’s blog post about it here.

Mom of Fame – Genny

Our favorite part about our Mom of Fame Interviews is sharing experiences of all different kinds of moms. This is why when we “met” Genny we were excited to share her unique experiences. She is originally from Columbia, has two teenage children and one toddler, and has gone through a difficult divorce. Her perspective of motherhood has been redefined by each of these things.

Please help us welcome another amazing mom into our Mom of Fame and check out her blog at the link below! Thanks for participating, Genny!

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Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

My name is Genny Gall. I am a Latina girl born in Colombia and living in CA. Dear wife of an adorable husband and father who unconditionally supports his family. I am a mother of three, a beautiful little girl who loves to explore the world, a boy who loves sports and an oldest daughter who follows my steps in art. I have a passion for style, creativity and a deep love for photography which all led me to create my blog in 2016: What’s up dearie. [It is a] blog related to Reviews, Photography, Beauty, Art, DIY and a little about life with style.

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

My mom always told me that the sooner I release my mind, and accept that things will not be the same, I can take things as they are with less anguish and things will flow. And it’s the same thought that I might deliver as advice to anyone. An example I have: I wanted to breastfeed a lot and for an extended period, but this was not my case, and that does not banish me from having achieved it or make me look like I am not a good mother. Not all of us have the same capacity.

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

I imagined motherhood as many women do, that it might seem rosy, and with children who seem to be little angels all the time. It is easy to create an idealized image of motherhood. But each woman lives motherhood in a different, distinctive and unique way. For me, real motherhood is full of good and bad moments; of hugs and laughter but also of diapers and screams of explosive children, even teens. I always just put all my efforts and take things slowly and calmly. Like the old proverb says, “let it be”, while being flexible and strict at the same time.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

Being a mother is an adventure. It is a journey to the incredible and a mix of emotions that even words can’t describe. It’s learning something new every day, so I am delighted in being stronger, patient and competitive.

Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

I felt quite overwhelmed when I separated from my ex-husband. It was a difficult time in which I did not know if I had made the best choice in my life or for my children because I was living a chaotic life then. The help of my parents was crucial, and this does not mean that I did not take care of my obligations as a mother, but the support of them helped me understand and overcome that stage. [I realized that] no matter how old you are, the parents will always be there. This state is one that I prefer not to recall because it’s [in the] past, and I do not like to live in the past. Now I have a new life, a husband that supports me and loves me no matter what. And the best of all, my husband and I don’t like drama at all.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

To live as a mother to me is to give everything, it has sacrifices without a doubt, but it earns more than it loses. I think I have not lost anything; on the contrary, it has made me a better person, more patient, affectionate, responsible and kind.

The only thing I could say, as a mother, is you have [to be able to] go to the bathroom with child supervision, because it is impossible to go to the bathroom alone.

What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?

Responsibility and respect.

Mom of Fame – Robin

Robin was one of those interviews that we read and said, “Wow. Other people need to see this!” She is the mom to 2 biological children, 1 foster child, and countless other people who have needed support over the years. She has been through a lot including divorce, poverty, and unemployment. All of these things can easily bring you down, but she decided to use them as a chance to learn and grow. She is now traveling with her family while also “world-schooling” her son and writing a novel.

Please help us welcome her to the Mom of Fame, it is a better place with her in it! Also check out her blog at the link below for all of her traveling adventures.

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Tell us a little about yourself and your family.

When I was a little girl, and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I responded, “A mom.” Frequently the response I received was “You are too smart for that, what else would you like to be?” From this, I learned that US society didn’t value motherhood. Luckily, that didn’t deter me from pursuing my dream of being a mother. I am fortunate to be the mother to two biological children, my son is 14 and my daughter is 21. I also am privileged to be called mom by my 29-year-old foster daughter. Our family also includes youth or friends who needed a place to stay, a safe space to be, or those without a traditional family of their own. I spent years as a single mama and parented while struggling to climb out of poverty. I recently remarried, and then, in a strange twist of fate, I was laid off from my job in academia. The position I believed would be the pathway to financial security for my family.

As a family, we decided to use lay off as an opportunity to do something profoundly different. We sold almost everything we owned and hit the road. I am now “world-schooling” my son and focusing on writing a young adult novel, “Mi vida, My sorrow, Mi Libertad,” which has been swirling around in my head since I finished my dissertation. The book is a tribute to alumni of foster care who generously shared their stories with me. For more about us and tales from a year of traveling as a family, please follow our blog at lifeeducationtravel.org.

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

The best piece of advice about motherhood I received was to not lose yourself while mothering. I wasn’t given that advice until I had been mothering for well over a decade and until after going through a divorce. When I first heard the advice, I probably thought something like “too late” or “yeah, right.” Now, in conversations with my adult children, they share how they loved seeing me play music, write stories, and pursue my passions. Pursuing my passions is good for me. It also helps my children believe they deserve to create a life they love. I definitely recommend this for all mamas. Children learn what they live. If we want our children to be happy, we must allow ourselves to do what makes us happy!

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

Honestly, even though I was deterred from being a mother as a child, I am still surprised how little mothers are respected and valued in the US. In my own life and in lived experiences of countless others, I see mothers taken for granted. Not only by their own families but also from professionals, and employers. Teachers and other school staff often talk about mothers negatively and complain they are not doing enough, without understanding their family situation. Is the mom also providing care for younger children, elderly parents, an ill spouse? Is she working multiple jobs, just to pay the bills? Is she struggling with her own physical or mental health issues? Additionally, in general, women earn less after having kids (https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/05/upshot/even-in-family-friendly-scandinavia-mothers-are-paid-less.html). This is not to say that I don’t love being a mom or watching my children grow into their unique selves. I wouldn’t give it up for anything. However, I do think, at least in the US, that we have an unrealistic expectation that mother’s should give of themselves tirelessly without receiving gratitude or the support they need to be able to thrive.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

Persistence. Honesty. Unconditional love for my family.

Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

After my divorce, I was utterly overwhelmed. It was during the housing collapse, so I lost my house and had no savings. The kids and I moved into a rental, and I had to start over from scratch. Shortly after, one of my mentors was murdered, and then I received word that my research funding would not continue and I was going to be laid off. Needless to say, it was one of the darkest times in my life. During that time, people who I barely knew rallied around me in a show of support. One friend, who is now considered family, started cooking dinner for us once a week. Other friends began stopping by under the guise they happened to be walking through the neighborhood. Although mothering was overwhelming during this time, it was also what pulled me through the darkness. I wanted to see my children laugh and I know they were looking to me to determine if things were going to be ok. I let my tears flow while I was in the shower away from their gaze. I created mini free-adventures we could enjoy without leaving our town. I invited their friends to invade our house en masse, so there was more laughter and activity. We had more people staying at our home on a regular basis than any time before or since. The friendships and teen hormones filled the house with life again. And even though I had to fake it for a while, things became “Ok” again.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

What I have lost and what I gained go hand and hand. I experienced a lot of trauma in my life. It hardened me, and I put up walls to protect my heart. My children softened me. They taught me how to love unconditionally and how to remain open even when I experienced pain. They taught me how to live together even when communication isn’t going well, how to forgive, how to get over hurt feelings and move forward. In many relationships, when things sour people go their separate ways but when this happens with my children we all want to make things right again, and so we learn how to communicate and collaborate until our relationships improve. Although being a mother changed my life path and I made choices that were different than I would have made if I was flying solo, I have gained much more than I lost. More than anything else I have achieved in my life, I am most proud to be called “mom.”

What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?

I hope my children have learned they can go after their dreams and they can create a life they love. I hope they have learned they deserve to be loved, respected, and honored as a person and within their relationships. I hope they learned to keep going no matter how hard life gets because the pain or struggle will pass and they will experience joy again.

Mom of Fame – Colleen

We were very excited to connect with Colleen through a blogging group we are a part of. She is a seasoned mom who does it all. She is a mom, a teacher, a wife, a blogger and an advocate for her daughter with severe anxiety and OCD. Even with all of this going on in her life she was nice enough to take some time out to share her expertise with us.

Please help us welcome her into our Mom of Fame, she is another deserving mom who we are honored to have join us. Also, be sure to check out her blog, Good Bye Anxiety, Hello Joy, it’s a great resource for moms dealing with similar circumstances.

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Tell us a little about yourself and your family.

My days are busy as a mother to a 13 year old daughter and a 10 year old son. I work as an elementary teacher and a blogger. My husband is a high school Athletic Director. In our free time, mainly school breaks, we spend as much time as possible outdoors and traveling. Our favorite places to visit are Hilton Head Island, SC and the mountains of Colorado. Good Bye Anxiety, Hello Joy, my blog, focuses on being a parent of a child with severe anxiety and OCD. These mental health issues are often invisible and carry a negative stigma, making it difficult for others to accept, for school to accommodate, and in finding quality health care. It is a lonely and isolating position, and with my blog, I hope to reach families in similar situations, allowing us to support and guide one another. My hope is that anxiety will not take away the joys that all children should experience.

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

Sitting around a group of friends, feeling ready to explode, I remember hearing the same refrain…”make it through the first few months and it is smooth sailing”. I repeated that chant over and over during the first few sleepless months while I struggled to nurse and find pockets of time to rest. Around 6 months of age, life improved and I thought, “I made it through the hardest part of being a mother”. WRONG. Each stage of childhood seems to have hard moments. The challenges vary greatly from throwing tantrums on the store floors when they are not allowed to get a new toy, to feeling heartbroken that they were not invited to a birthday party, to finding clothes that fit but do not show off too much skin. Looking back, I believe that advice was given with the best of intentions but I felt like it was false advertising. I believed the advice, using it through the first months of a newborn. It was valid advice for the first year or so, seeing that around 6 months into parenting I felt like I had a handle on things. However, it did not hold true over the course of my child’s 13 years. I would be more honest in using that advice. The first few months are definitely the most challenging in terms of learning to be a mother and building your confidence, but not in terms of raising a child. More sound advice would be that each child has his or her own needs that will ebb and flow over time. As they grow and change, the challenges will change as well. Take each stage and find the joy that comes with it, all the while knowing these moments won’t last forever.

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

I naively thought since I was a kindergarten teacher, with a class of 20 students, parenting one child would be a breeze. I was comfortable with the parenting in the sense of relating to a child, interacting, finding fun opportunities, and all of the joy that comes with watching your child grow. However, I was unprepared for the mental side of raising a child. There is so much emotion and responsibility tied to being a mother. That connection is with you at all times, always thinking about your child, the decisions, you need to make, the what ifs of life, and the guilt of mistakes of working full time. The mental strain from always thinking and worrying about your child is so much more profound than I imagined.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

Acceptance– I accept my children for who they are, with all the good and bad that comes with self discovering and unique individuals.

Empathy– I believe that no matter what my child is feeling, it must be validated as important in order for them to trust and seek my help and comfort.

Fun– I make sure to see the world through the eyes of a child. I want them to be as carefree and have as much fun as possible. They are past the age where everything is “magical” but I still try to make as many opportunities as I can fun.

Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

My daughter suffers from debilitating anxiety and OCD. To see her suffering and in pain, and not be able to take it away, is heartbreaking. I research, make appointments, meet with schools, and accommodate our lives in the hopes of easing her anxiety and providing her needed resources but it can become overwhelming and hopeless at times. Hearing her ask “why am I like this” or “will I ever get better” and not having a solid answer tears me apart. Going to a therapist has helped me put her needs into perspective and given me tools to better manage my thoughts and feelings.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

As a mother, I have lost a sense of security that I once felt. I see so much pain and suffering in our world and that trickles down to my kids. I try to allow my kids the freedom to be kids but the daily barrage of terrible news makes me vulnerable to the need to overly protect my children.

However, the confidence and understanding I have gained as a mother outweighs all of the negativity. I am so much more open minded and realize that every family faces their own daily struggles. I want to help and encourage others rather than judge and criticize.

What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?

No matter how hard life can seem each day, there are still moments of joy and happiness that can be found. Learning to be grateful for small moments has a profound impact on the way that you see life. Recognizing the feeling of warmth from the sun, hearing your child giggle, a bedtime snuggle, or enjoying a warm coffee are all worth celebrating.