Mom of Fame – Krystal: Surviving a Car Accident & Thriving as a New Mom

Krystal is another amazing mom we are excited to introduce you to. She went from surviving a very serious car accident to thriving as a new mom to a beautiful 5 month old baby girl. She talks about how her accident changed her outlook on life, what it’s like to have your baby in the NICU, and how working with children for over 14 years helped (and sometimes hindered) her role as a mom. Please help us welcome her into the Mom of Fame!

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Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

I am a stay at home mom, and my boyfriend Curtis owns his own IT business. We have a 5 month old baby girl named Aria and a Yorkie toy poodle named Charlee. I was in a horrible auto accident last March which resulted in a lot of injuries to my pelvis and ribs, a shattered femur, TBI (traumatic brain injury), and a broken arm. So right around the time I was healing we unexpectedly found out I was pregnant (after being careful). [I was] on many medications still from the pain of the accident and had an upcoming surgery; I was terrified. But fast forward a year later and I still have an upcoming surgery, but we are learning to be parents regardless of my injuries, and I have learned that momming isn’t for the weak! Lol!

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

The best advice was in the beginning to give myself some grace. I had an awful pregnancy surrounded with all day sickness for the whole 9 months (I only gained 12 lbs)! Everyone was saying to enjoy being pregnant, but I couldn’t; I was in bed all last year [between being] pregnant and still healing from my accident. My birth went about as smoothly as it could go. I did hypo-birthing, had a doula and a midwife.  I also got chiropractic adjustments twice that week which I think all that combined helped, but overall God cut me a break on her birth after 41 weeks of being bed bound and not being able to eat chicken, smell food and living mainly on broth, toast and cheez-its for that whole time. 

I was exhausted during pregnancy and people’s advice was to sleep, and boy did I ever! So my biggest advice to any new mom would be sleep as much as you can, go on a baby moon with your spouse, have meals prepped for about the first 2 weeks, give yourself some grace in the beginning and ask and plan for help for at least 2 weeks (hire someone, your mom, sisters, aunts whatever you got to do). You’re gonna wanna shower, sleep and eat in peace and have a moment to yourself and they can help!

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

Honestly it’s a wild thought. After a horrible pregnancy, but a great birth I was given this beautiful human. And on no sleep, I was expected to know how to nurse, and/or learn ( learning anything on no sleep is real fun) and know her every need because I am her mom. It was very overwhelming for me. And on day 2 my baby girl was whisked off to the NICU for monitoring because of the medication I was on when pregnant (that I couldn’t stop taking or it risked miscarriage).

The NICU is a whole new beast. Even though she was the biggest and one of the healthiest ones in there, my heart broke leaving her and seeing all of those innocent babies in there. Leaving your new baby and going home without her is a pain I can’t describe; it was really hard. So ultimately she was home after 72 hours and bringing her home was terrifying. People just expect because you gave birth you know how to care for this little person.

It’s a huge adjustment period, and I couldn’t have done it without the help of my mom and Curtis. I was always so jealous of moms, and I thought I would know right away. But the sleep is the hardest one for me. Being expected to heal yourself, sleep when the baby sleeps, (which is awful advice and makes you feel like a living cow whose job is to feed and be a robot for your babies needs ONLY).

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

Honestly I am not sure, I just try to take everything day to day. After my accident I really learned tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. So I would say I have a strength in wanting my daughter to experience life; every aspect of it. And to not be afraid but be prepared, smart and fearless. 

Describe a time when you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

A time? It’s not supposed to be all the time? Lol.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

I feel like when you become a mother, the old you dies in a way and a new you is born. The struggle begins when you’re trying to learn your baby, your new life, routine, relationship with your partner, and just survive. All while you’re fragile emotionally and physically and all of the same expectations stand as before–such as the home, work, friendships, life. How do you get to know your new self when your baby comes first?

I think I struggled for a while with the old me and new me. Every small task is harder once you’re a mom. The newborn days feel like never ending and it’s overwhelming getting adjusted. But the light at the end of the tunnel is that beautiful baby who thinks you’re the world. She is my miracle baby, and God gave me her for a reason and had me live that awful day, I know now, for her. And that’s all in the world worth gaining.

What do you want your child to learn from you?

I want her to be able to be strong, hardworking and know that life doesn’t give handouts and anything will and can happen. So always be ready for a curve ball but be able to land back on your feet. 

You were a nanny and a teacher for a long time before you became a mother. How do you think that changed your approach to motherhood? How would your approach to teaching or nannying change now that you’re a mother?

I totally thought that working with children for 14+ years I would be equipped in every way for motherhood. When, in fact, it made things harder. I had so much experience that I had unrealistic expectations for myself and my child. I knew what she should be doing, what I was “supposed” to be doing and I was harder on myself when things didn’t go as desired. Every child is different. And I had to remember I was taking care of those kids on a full night’s sleep, and I could check out and leave.

However it also, I believe, made things easier then if I didn’t have that experience. I knew what I needed before she was born, and it wasn’t wipe warmers, and frilly clothes it was jammies, Binky’s and baby wearing. It helped me be realistic. I know she’s gonna throw tantrums, not sleep, and get sick eventually. I knew what teething would be like, and I was calm about all of the normal things children go through because I had dealt with it before with other people’s kids.

My biggest advice is to have help ready, and don’t be afraid to ask for it, you are only human. Also, sleep when you can, love your kids, love your relationship and get away for a break when you can for your sanity. Because your sanity makes you an amazing mom. Don’t judge any other moms; we all are just trying to survive and love our kids and learn our new selves while doing it. 

Mom of Fame – Alis: Twins and a Singleton

We are so excited to highlight our next mom! Alis is a standout mom that is strong, kind and honestly, one of a kind. Her and her husband had a harder road to getting pregnant, but were blessed with twins and a few years later a baby girl.

Please welcome her to the Mom of Fame!

Tell us about yourself and your family!

My name is Alis and I have been married to my husband Darrel for almost 11 years. I have 8 year old boy/girl twins and a 6 year old daughter. We tried for 2 years to get pregnant and during that time I was diagnosed with PCOS and we ended up needing fertility treatments which gave us the twins. All 3 kids have completely different personalities and keep us on our toes.

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

When I was pregnant so many people said “take the help you are offered”. I didn’t realize what that meant until I had kids and learned quickly that it truly takes a village. My immediate family is amazing, and I always knew they would be there, but those outside supporting roles were crucial. I am glad I kept that advice in mind and definitely pass it along with a little more elaboration. It’s hard to admit that sometimes we feel under water and invite people to take things off our plate. We feel that accepting help is admitting weakness, but in reality we have so many people put in our paths to not just make us feel better but to add to our children’s lives. Our children’s lives have been changed because we took the help offered by their teachers, principal, school district, their friends’ parents, and our own friends. It really does take a village!

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

I am an over researcher; if I am going to do something you better believe I have obsessed over it for some time. During our fertility journey I was on every article, blog, forum, website you could imagine. I had this wonderful plan that I knew was perfect, until I was handed my babies (and yes you think you can make a plan no matter how many you have). I didn’t realize that in spite of your best efforts your plans will fly out the window and that you will probably go against every rule you set for yourself at some point in time.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

My sense of humor in most situations. If I didn’t laugh I would probably cry, a lot. Plus my kids have very tough skin because they have learned to laugh at themselves. What is life without laughter?

My ability to not be too high strung. I know my kids will be kids and that means they will get dirty, they will get hurt but they will learn and it’s okay. I can’t teach them some things, only living life can do that.

My ability to apologize. It’s hard being a kid just like it’s hard being a parent. Every stage of life is new to me as a parent. Sometimes I get it wrong and I am not too proud to tell my kids, “I am sorry, I was wrong, can you please forgive me?” I think it’s important for them to know it’s okay to make a mistake but also to own up and apologize no matter who you are.

Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

It’s always overwhelming, I don’t think you are doing it right if you aren’t overwhelmed. This is the hardest job on the planet and we do it everyday with no breaks, even when we aren’t with them our minds are.

I will say my most overwhelming experience, specifically, was when my daughter was diagnosed with ADHD. This was when taking help was crucial. We went through some really trying times during that period but her school stepped up in a big way and has gotten her so much help. She has adjusted beautifully but that almost broke me.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

I don’t feel I lost anything in a bad way. I think that before kids my sense of accomplishment was so different. Instead of measuring success and life goals by money and material things (although I wouldn’t turn down winning lottery numbers) my success in this world is my children.

What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?

To laugh – always to laugh, it will make your life so much richer.

To be kind – be kind when no one can see you and be kind when you know you can never be repaid.

Always do your best – even if you fall short, no one can ever ask you for more than your best.

Finally, to love – love yourself, love each other, and love those you don’t know. Love without bounds and love unconditionally.

Can you tell us some of the differences in pregnancy and motherhood (in general) that you have experienced with having twins vs. a singleton?

I think I got lucky having twins first because I didn’t know the difference. They were my baseline for pregnancy. When I was pregnant with my singleton I was amazed how much easier I could breathe and move. Looking back at pictures now and how big I was with twins I have no idea how I did it!

Mom of Fame – Jamie : A New Mom’s Take on Returning to Work

We are so grateful every day to all of the moms who are willing to share their stories with us. Next up is Jamie! She is an amazing mom to a 6 month old boy (and 2 adorable dogs!). She talks about not being a people-pleaser (anymore), how pregnancy was pretty terrifying, and the ups and downs of being a working mom. Please help us welcome Jamie into our Mom of Fame, she definitely deserves it!

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Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

My name is Jamie, and I’m a new mom to my son, Max, who is 6 months old! I live in Oakland Township with my husband, Chad. I’m also a pharmacist and dog mom to two sweet goldendoodles, Maddie and Chloe. 

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

“Do what’s right for your family, not what others think you should do.”

I am a people pleaser so this can be difficult for me. Sometimes the best decisions for our family may not make others happy, and I need to accept that.

Also, what is best for another child or family may not be what is best for my own. It is easy to get caught up in comparing which isn’t healthy or productive.

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

People are quick to tell you the negatives of parenthood, and I think I had a skewed view of what our new lives would look like due to this. When pregnant, I constantly had people telling me to sleep while I still could and to enjoy my freedom while it lasted. Since Max was born, I still sleep (though some nights not as much as I would like!) and don’t feel like I have lost all my freedom. Any challenges pale in comparison to the overwhelming amount of love and joy our son has brought us. It has been a much more natural, joyous transformation to motherhood than I imagined.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

Patience, empathy, and love.

Describe a time when you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

Pregnancy was overwhelming and at times, completely terrifying, for me. Our journey to have a baby was difficult. As my pregnancy with Max progressed, I felt more secure but can’t say I ever relaxed until he was born healthy. We are blessed in that Max is generally a very calm, happy baby without any health issues thus far. I can’t say I’ve been too overwhelmed since his birth (at least so far!).

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

It is harder to find time for myself, such as working out or getting pedicures. I feel guilty not spending time with my son when I’m not working, and I also try to clean and do laundry when he’s sleeping. I have gained the most precious baby boy, and the love and joy he has brought to my life is indescribable.

What do you want your child to learn from you?

I hope Max learns kindness and love. I pray he grows up to be a kind, emotionally aware, humble adult who helps make the world a better place. 

How has your transition to being a working mom been? What has been the hardest part? What advice would you give to other moms going back to work after having a baby?

The transition of returning to work has been the most challenging part of motherhood so far. Thankfully, I have a career I love which helps tremendously. The hardest part of working has, of course, been leaving my son. I rarely left my son during my 14 weeks on maternity leave. My husband encouraged me to get out of the house when he was home from work, because it can be isolating to be home all day by yourself with a newborn. Besides those short trips, though, I never left Max. The thought of leaving him with anyone else caused me (and honestly still causes me) so much anxiety. 

The weeks leading up to my return to work were difficult. I struggle with relinquishing control, so the thought of being away from him and me not being there to comfort him when he cried was gut wrenching. My husband took a week and a half off with him before he started daycare, which helped ease the transition. I still felt emotionally and physically drained from being away from him. The first day of daycare was a hard day – I burst into tears as soon as I walked into the building. Thankfully his teachers all were very understanding and made things easier by sending smiling pictures. 

Besides the difficult transition those early days and missing Max, returning to work has had positives for all of us. Staying home with a baby can be lonely (especially a winter baby), and I felt more like myself once I got into a routine and returned to work. I make sure to make the most of time with him when I’m home and on my days off. My husband cares for Max by himself some nights and every other weekend while I’m working. I tend to take over when I’m home, so having this one on one bonding time has been great for the two of them. I have seen an increase in my husband’s confidence when it comes to parenting, and Max lights up whenever he is around my husband. It has also been healthy for our relationship to fairly equally share in both caring for Max and having careers. 

People are quick to judge how you choose to raise your child. I have gotten judgement, questions (even from total strangers), and opinions on if I “have to” work full time and especially about using daycare. I don’t know that I will always work full time, but it is the right decision for our family now. We chose to use daycare to give our family consistency, reliability, social interaction for Max, and learning opportunities. This decision was not well received by all our family, and everyone seems to have an opinion. I remember someone telling me prior to even being pregnant with Max that my priorities would change once I had a baby and that I would have to quit my job. My priorities have never changed – I desperately wanted to have a child. Max has been and always will be my top priority, regardless of whether or not I work. I’ve been thrilled to see him thrive at daycare the 3-4 days a week he is there.

We are all doing what we think is best for our families and children, and I wish people weren’t so quick to judge. We can all be the perfect moms for our babies whether we work part or full time, stay at home, use grandparents for childcare, have a nanny, or use daycare! 

My advice for a mom returning to work after having a baby is to give yourself grace. I am sure I looked quite disheveled those early weeks after returning to work as I was trying to figure out how to balance everything and get a morning routine down. I was completely exhausted (and still am some days) from working full time, pumping milk, caring for Max, cleaning bottles and pump parts at night, trying to clean and do laundry, and often waking up multiple times each night with Max. Everything gets easier with time and an adjustment period. Always keep in mind that you can be an amazing mom whether you work full time or stay home!

Mom of Fame – Kelly : Single Mom, Boy Mom, Super Mom

We are so lucky to have this continually growing group of moms that are willing to share their stories and experiences with us. Next up on the Mom of Fame is Kelly. She is a single mother of one awesome *almost* 12 year old boy. She talks motherhood, raising a son on her own and the humor that comes with being a #boymom.

Please welcome her to the mom of fame!

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Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family.

My name is Kelly and I am a single mother of an amazing almost 12-year-old boy, Dylan. We are settled in Michigan with our dog Ryder and have been here for almost 8 years.

What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?

I would say that the best piece of advice anyone ever gave me was to offer a bottle right away even though I was breastfeeding. Many people are so quick to judge what is best (breastfeeding or bottle feeding) and so for me when I was able to do both, it gave me a sense of relief and freedom. I primarily breastfed up until 8 months however, there were times I was sick and needed to be on antibiotics that I could not breastfeed, so I was thankful Dylan was already used to a bottle when he needed it. It was also nice to be able to pump and have him get used to someone else feeding him.

How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?

No one could have prepared me for motherhood. It is so much more (the good and the bad) than I could have ever imagined. It is the most rewarding thing I have ever done.

What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?

3 supermom powers that I have are:

The ability to raise my son to be a good human being
The grace to be able to find humor in almost every situation
Perseverance (it has been challenging raising a son on my own)

Describe a time when you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.

I had to laugh at “describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother”…. EVERY DAMN DAY came to mind!

If I had to choose one moment that stands out it would be when my son was 7 months old and we flew to Washington State from Michigan and were waiting for his father to return home from Iraq. We didn’t have housing yet so we were staying in a hotel room. I had help picking up our truck that had been in storage so we had a vehicle. My son ended up with Pneumonia and so did I along with mastitis. When I went to take us to the doctors, the truck had died. So I had a sick baby, no transportation and no help. We finally ended up taking a taxi (yes it was before Uber was a thing) to the hospital. When we finally got home with our antibiotics, all he wanted to do was nurse however I couldn’t. I remember crying sitting on the bathroom floor thinking “how am I going to get through this”! After hours of crying on both of our ends, he took a bottle and we were both able to sleep. A team mate of his fathers came and fixed the truck so we were no longer stranded and his father returned home a few days later from deployment.

Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?

I lost a lot of myself becoming a mom. For a long time I forgot who I was and what I liked to do because all of that energy is put into raising another human. At some point that changed and I was able to become a better version of who I was before I was a mom. I have gained so much being a mom! I have gained patience, grace, tenacity, and honestly a life long best friend. My son is a missing piece to my life that I never knew even existed.

What do you want your child to learn from you?

I want my son to learn how to love people, and love big! To me, raising someone with good values who makes a difference in the lives of those around him is what is important to me. I want him to see that anything is possible and that as cliche as it is “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”!

You are a boy mom! You and your son seem to have such a wonderful relationship. For other moms that are raising boys – What would you say is your number one piece of advice for having such a close relationship with your son is?

I love being a mom of a boy. And honestly, I cried when I found out he wasn’t going to be a girl! Now, I couldn’t imagine it any other way. He is my best buddy, he brings me water when I am sick, is my biggest fan, loves life, and is just an overall good person. To moms who are raising boys, I would say, raise boys who are well rounded and teach them it is OK to have feelings. We are raising men who will one day hopefully be a partner to someone else, and will need to be loving and strong. And get ready to learn more than you will ever want to know about boogers, farts, poop, sports, dirt, and so much more!

Five Things Every Working Mom NEEDS During the Week

Going back to work after the second child was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. Not only are you grappling with the fact that you are leaving your three month old with a stranger (and paying a lot of money for it), but you are scared to jump back into your job and give it 100%. 

I have been back at it for a little over a month now and here are a couple of the things that have saved me.

Kroger Clicklist (or any other drive-up/at home service)

We would never eat if it wasn’t for these services. We drop the kids off at daycare, work eight hours, pick the kids up and go home. We are out of the house from about 7:30 until 5:30. This does not leave a ton of time to grocery shop.

I have only used clicklist and although my order isn’t always perfect, I love it. It allows me to leave the kids in the car. I don’t have to take the three year old and infant into the store. This is a miracle. 

Organization/Planning

I love planning vacations. I love planning fun weekends with the kids. I do not like planning the day to day schedule. Between work, pumping (yes, pumping), appointments and somewhat of a social life, our day to day needs to be planned and organized. 

A few things that have helped me is that I have literally every single thing ready the night before. This includes all my pumping equipment, my daughters bottles, my sons clothes (and mine) all ready the night before. This allows me to just get up and get ready to get out the door.

I keep a large weekly calendar in the kitchen by the door. This way my husband can’t miss it and can see what we have going for the week. 

I also plan and schedule every single pumping session at work. I try and time this with the time that her daycare will be feeding her the bottles. This works for me. 

 

Support System

No joke. This is the most important of them all. My husband and I are SO incredibly lucky to have such wonderful parents. They have made this transition a lot easier on us. 

My parents watch my daughter on Tuesdays and along with that have been picking up my son from daycare that day. My mother in law has been picking up my son on Mondays and this is a huge help. 

Both kids go to two different daycares so I am in the car after work for about an hour and a half. By them picking up my son it saves me so much time. It’s so wonderful. 

Another important part of my support system is the texts and calls from friends. I know I have cried, complained and gone out of my mind. I appreciate you all listening.

Having a positive mindset

I know many of you might think this sounds lame, but this is SO key to having a good week. If you start your week without this your entire week will be ruined. I know. I’ve gone into Monday morning with an awful attitude and it changed my whole week.

I get it. Sometimes it’s really hard to stay positive in the AM. You have been up with your baby, your toddler and dog (just me?). 

Time to yourself

This one actually took me a good long while to actually understand. Not until recently was I giving myself any time after the kids went to bed. Once they went to bed I was instantly in as well. Sometimes this is still the case, but you quickly realize that this is your only alone time. Period. 

I have been staying up and watching some TV or reading or, honestly, just doing nothing at all. 

My house is not always clean and clutter free. I am not always put together like I was before kids. Being a working mom is HARD. You are constantly thinking about your kids during work and work when you’re with your kids. It’s hard to turn either off. 

I am so very lucky to have a husband, family and friends that help and support me. Also, this mom community in which we started. It gives both Erin and I an outlet to learn, discuss, complain and relish in the joys of motherhood. 

Let me know if you have any great tips or tricks to make the work week a little easier!

What To Do When a Friend Loses a Parent

Six months ago my dad passed away (it still takes my breath away to say that). Before this, I didn’t have much experience with death. My dad’s best friend passed away when I was in college and both of my grandfathers passed away shortly after college; and these obviously affected me, but nothing prepared me for my dad’s. I want to write about dealing with the grief of losing a parent along with having a toddler but I’m still not ready to do that (I promise, I will, though).

Instead, I’m going to talk about what I learned. I learned that some of your friends will be extremely supportive, and others unfortunately won’t. My dad’s death was fairly sudden but we did have some lead up time to it and in that time (and the time following) I really learned what friends I could count on. I had several friends who offered to watch Ryan (and did) so that I could be at the hospital; I had other friends who ordered or dropped off food for us to eat; and I had friends who would check in every day to make sure I was doing okay. And yes, I had friends who did all of this…and even more! I also, unfortunately, had some friends who did not even mention the passing to me. I was later told this was because “they didn’t know how to handle the death of a friend’s parent”.

I’m not going to lie to you, it’s very hard to understand before you have personally gone through it, so I can’t completely fault them for not knowing what to do. Now that I have gone through it, though, let me help you support your friends if and when they go through the same. 

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Here are the 5 things I would suggest you do if a friend loses a parent:

1. Say Something (even if it’s not perfect)

Shortly after my dad died I was reading It’s Okay to Laugh (Crying is Cool Too) by Nora McInerney. In it she talks about the stupid things people said to her after her husband died. A lot of the things were awkward and some were even funny but after hearing it all she concluded, “It’s okay for us to stumble for words when we’re faced with death and sickness and grief; it’s okay for stupid and awkward ones to slip out where we’d hoped sweet and comforting ones would have appeared. You may be the person who says the wrong thing, but that’s better than being the one who says nothing at all.” (McInerney, 232).

This really hit me. I never know what to say at funerals or if someone is going through something hard and, likewise I honestly don’t know what I wanted them to say to me. But I wanted them to SAY SOMETHING. I had a few people say things to me that weren’t the most articulate or even helpful, but I appreciated that much more than the silence. Acknowledgement can go a long way so just remember that when someone you know is going through something hard.

2. Offer to Help (in a specific way)

After my dad died everyone said “let me know what I can do to help”. I so appreciated that but to be honest with you I rarely cashed in the favor. I could barely think straight so I had a hard time coming up with ways that people could help me (even though I probably could have used their help). What really helped was when someone said something specific like, “I’m going to call during lunch so you’re not alone with your thoughts”, or “lets go for a walk and talk about it” or “I’m going to drop off dinner in a few minutes, I’ll just leave it on the porch so you don’t have to host company”. Thinking of specific things you can do for the person is so much more helpful when they are in the heat of grief. 

3. Send Something (if you can’t help)

Obviously not all of my friends live around us or were able to help directly because of their schedules. Many that couldn’t specifically help, though, sent something instead. Whether it was a meal from a local restaurant, a gift card to a meal delivery service, or just a donation to the charity we belong to, it all really meant something to us!

4. Show Up (if you’re able to)

Whenever I saw a friend show up at the funeral I would cry. That doesn’t sound good, but I promise you it was. Just having a support system the day of the viewing and/or funeral was essential to me making it through it (even if those friends were crying just as hard as I was!). So make sure you show up if you’re able to, you never know how much your friend is depending on that!

5. Check In After the Funeral (and even 6 months later)

Dealing with the death of a parent is hard, there is honestly no sugar- coating it. Once the funeral is over, it’s out of the minds of many, but definitely not out of the family’s. It’s not something I want to talk about all of the time but just having friends check in once in a while makes me feel better. Especially on the days that it’s obviously tough, like birthdays and anniversaries; I had several friends check in on me on Father’s Day and it really made the day easier. I know we’re all busy with our own stuff, but really try to think about your friend and check in occasionally. You never know when they’re having a rough day!

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Seems easy enough, right? Let me know what helped you through the death of a loved one, I’m sure there are things I missed.