Moming through the Pandemic – Lisa: Full time working mom of two

Wow. How does one even start something like this? For the last (almost) year we have been moming through a pandemic. Did you ever see something like this coming? Were you prepared for it? I wasn’t.

I remember when it first started in our town and the absolute fear that went through my mind. I learned to tame that fear a bit as the months went on, but it’s still there. Not being able to see friends or family or go out and about like we used to do is hard. It’s hard for everyone, but we do what we need to do to stay healthy and get back to normal (whatever that might be).

We wanted to hear from all the moms out there. How are you? What are you feeling? I know I am completely overwhelmed. In the next couple of weeks we are going to do a spin on our Mom of Fame. We are going to be asking you how it’s been Moming through the Pandemic.

• 

• 

• 

Tell us about yourself and your family.

Most of you already know that I am one part of the Momfaming duo. I have a five year old son and an almost two year old girl. I am a full-time working mom and the last year has been nothing short of challenging.

My kids are in daycare so that my husband and I can both work. Sometime in March the daycare closed down and didn’t reopen until July. Both of our works had us working from home (and we both still do). We managed to get work done and still keep our kids busy by the skin of our teeth. Want to know if you are a patient mom? Get thrown into a pandemic when you can’t leave your house. It tested the best of us.

How has life changed for you since quarantine began?

My priorities have changed 100%. My kids have, and always will, remain the top priority. My husband and work were, of course, up there too. The biggest thing that changed was how I viewed the space I was living in. I never cared so much about those sort of things prior. Our house was always cluttered and messy and it didn’t bother me (until I had people coming over).

Now that I work, live and spend almost 100% of my time in my house I care. I care SO much. Dishes can’t be left for the next day, vacuuming has to be done daily, clutter is getting thrown out or donated. I had to have a nice, clean, light workspace.

My house became my sanctuary and it needed to show itself as such.

• 

• 

What is something positive that has come out of having to quarantine?

Watching my youngest turn from a baby to a toddler. Since Adam and I work full-time we miss a lot of moments in development. This is the hardest part of being a working mom. Going into an office and knowing that you are missing these precious fleeting moments with your kids.

The gap of time where we had the kids home with us Cece learned to say words, walk and came into her own little personality. It was a perfect time to, literally, watch her grow.

What is the hardest part about it?

I have to narrow this down to three things. I think we can all, obviously, state that the hardest thing about this pandemic is seeing how many people are losing their loved ones without being by their side. I cannot even imagine this scenario (even though we have had people very close to us get it – one is still recovering after months).

1. Not seeing family or friends. Right from the start Adam and I knew that we would be sticking to the rules and keeping our bubble incredibly small. At first it was no one. In the summer we would see a few family and friends outside. In the fall/winter we just saw grandparents.
2. Watching my son notice how different the world is. Ben and I had a standing date every single weekend. Whether it was going to a movie, out to lunch, a trip to the mall or a playdate with a friend. Him and I always have our own special time out of the house with each other. His favorite thing was to go to restaurants. He loved the whole act of it. Picking where to go, where we would be sitting, what he would get to drink/eat and watching people (and playing Pokémon Go).
3. Being the best mom and employee at the same time. For four months we were juggling working full-time while also being a full-time mom. Luckily, Adam and I were both at home and shared the responsibility. You had to move from one thing to another seamlessly and it was ROUGH. The kids needed attention, but so did work. It took some time, but Adam and I figured it out and tried to rock it out.

• 

• 

• 

What have you learned about yourself during this time?

Beside having a lot more patience then I thought I had?!

I learned self-confidence. I am not sure why it took a pandemic to make me see it, but I found out that I am a really good mom. There are still days that I don’t feel that way, but looking at the last year I know that I kicked ass and that I make it all work.

My kids got a lot of screen time, but they also got SO much more love, attention and play-time than they ever thought possible.

• 

• 

• 

What surprised you the most about your child(ren) during this time?

How adaptive they can be. Things changed and things changed almost overnight. They went from seeing friends and family every single weekend to just mom and dad. They went from going to daycare and being occupied all day to independently playing.

Every time something changed they rolled with it. They didn’t freak out, they didn’t cry (maybe I did a little) and they didn’t complain.

What are you most looking forward to doing once life gets back to ‘normal’?

Oh, man. I miss SO much. I am so looking forward to planning a big ten year trip with Adam. I am looking forward to spending more time with my nieces (and nephew – when he can come from Cali!). I am SO looking forward to going out and grabbing a drink with my friends.

They say you don’t miss it until it’s gone and boy are they right. These minor things in life that you use to take for granted have a whole new meaning now. I guess that’s something I’ve learned as well. To live a simpler life and to be forever grateful for what we have.

What is something you began doing during quarantine that you will continue to do (or hope to) once it’s over? Why?

I have really enjoyed working from home. I didn’t think I would at the start, but now I really think I flourish in my work space. I got myself a desk and a beautiful set-up. I am able to work longer hours without sacrificing my family. It’s really a great work/home/family balance and I hope that I can continue doing so.

• 

• 

• 

• 

Anything else you want to add?

I feel like quarantine with your kids and spouse could really go one of two ways and that there would be no in-between. We had the best days, we had good days, we had bad days and we had the worst days. It was really one of those in-between scenarios.

The BEST days outweighed the worst days by far. We became an incredibly close family that started understanding each other so much more. Day in and day out with the same people will do that. You know when to back off and when to lean in.

It’s been a very crazy last year, but I am forever grateful for the ones I am quarantining with.

Tips for Road Trippin’ with Young Children

My husband and I recently got back from road tripping to Charleston, SC with our two young children. The drive, if driven straight through, is about 13.5 hours. Yes, read that again, 13.5 hours. We had done a similar drive with Ben, our four year old, a couple years back and it was wonderful. No one told me it was game over when you added another child to the mix.

This trip was so wonderful and insane and tiring and lovely and awful all at the same time. I hate using the word awful, but there are no better words to describe some of the time (mostly the drive).

Charleston is a beautiful wonderful city with so much to do and see. Adam and I would love to go back without kiddos one day.

The drive was about 80% fine and 20% not. You’d think those odds aren’t bad, but you’re wrong. The 20% really negated that 80%. I’m glad we did it, but we won’t do it again until they are older!

Here are my tips for anyone that is coming upon a big road trip:

1. Don’t do it. Wait until the kids are a little older. I’m not trying to be dramatic, but at four and almost a year it was rough. We had a family wedding and so much stuff so we knew this was something we had to do. I don’t like flying. At all. But it would have been better.
2. Bring multiple tablets. Not kidding. We had three. One was loaded with shows, one had a bunch of non educational games and one had educational games. Our four year old went through them all.
3. Bring ALL THE SNACKS. Not just for your oldest, but for the baby as well. Without snacks we would have never made the drive in two days.
4. Let go of the notion that you will get to your destination at a certain time. I so desperately wanted to get to Charleston by lunchtime the second day. I thought it would be easy. Ha. The universe said I don’t think so. We got there around dinner time.
5. You’re going to have to stop. I hate this. I hate stopping. I just want to keep driving. Impossible. That first day we stopped three times. Give in and let go.
6. Try and get separate sleeping spaces when you stop overnight. Needless to say – we didn’t get much sleep.
7. This is obvious, but always go for the Airbnb or vrbo when vacationing. Homes are always better than hotels.
8. While vacationing make sure that you and your spouse allow time for each of you to get out. My husband and I took turns during nap time to go out and explore on our own.
9. Date night. We were lucky enough to have my parents there for a night to watch the kids. This allowed the two of us to recharge and have a little adult time.
10. Look at restaurants ahead of time. A lot of places weren’t kid friendly so I looked them up to see if there was a kids menu. If there was I would make a reservation! Most places took reservations and it was a blessing!
11. Try your best to make good memories.

As much as I say it was hard, it was really great too. When I ask Ben about it he tells me his favorite parts were the wedding (which was amazing) and our last full day. Our last full day was honestly just walking to the park, walking by the water and eating some food. It made my heart happy.

Good luck to all of you out there planning road trips with your families for spring break. Got any tips to help out other mamas?!

Surgery and Being a Mom Don’t Mix

This past Monday night was a pretty scary night for me. It had been a full weekend of family (between a family cook off and baptism)! My brother from California and his family were in town and the fun was just beginning.

Well, around 7:00 pm (while we were bathing the kids) my chest really started to hurt. I’ve had an attack like this before and just went downstairs to take some tums. A couple hours later and it still didn’t go away. I took a strong antacid and tried to sleep.

Around 1:00 am, when I still couldn’t sleep, I woke Adam up and he urged me to go to the ER. I declined for a bit, but thought it may be in my best interest. I drove myself to the ER and upon getting there and walking in I vomited three times. I checked myself in and all the tests began. They ruled out a heart attack (which I didn’t think it was), but wanted to check my gallbladder.

Ding ding ding! That was it. I had gallstones and needed to get it removed. Usually this is outpatient, but my blood was telling them that my liver enzymes and bilirubin was high. This told them that I most likely had one stuck in the bile duct. I had to wait a FULL 36 hours in the hospital before I was able to receive the test needed. I was PRAYING I didn’t have one stuck as this would have led to another procedure to take the stuck one out. They told me that if they had to do it there was a 1/20 chance that I would develop pancreatitis (due to my age). Let the praying begin.

Another 12 hours to get the results, but the stone passed and all I needed was the gallbladder out. Woo hoo!

The week in the hospital was rough. My mind went everywhere. I hadn’t eaten since 6:00 pm on Monday and I didn’t get out until 4:00 pm on Friday. It was rough. I missed my kids an insane amount and my breastmilk supply dropped.

Cece had to have formula. I know this isn’t a big deal to most. Fed is best and I understand that, but this was taken away in a very awful manner for me. I didn’t have a choice. I am working an insane amount to get it back. Right now she is a 50/50 baby.

I thank god I married the man that I did. He stepped up like I never thought possible. He was dad, mom, homemaker, provider and still came to see me everyday. He was and is being a wonderful man.

Recovery has started. It’s almost like I have to bond with my baby all over again (cue the tears). I can’t pick her up for four weeks and that’s going to kill me.

I count myself as one of the luckiest people on the planet though. I have an incredible husband, parents and in-laws that have gone out of their way to help and stay with me and wonderful friends who have checked in everyday and even brought over fun goodie bags (thanks, Erin!).

I now need tips and tricks to get my breastmilk supply up and running. Please help!!

Five Things Every Working Mom NEEDS During the Week

Going back to work after the second child was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. Not only are you grappling with the fact that you are leaving your three month old with a stranger (and paying a lot of money for it), but you are scared to jump back into your job and give it 100%. 

I have been back at it for a little over a month now and here are a couple of the things that have saved me.

Kroger Clicklist (or any other drive-up/at home service)

We would never eat if it wasn’t for these services. We drop the kids off at daycare, work eight hours, pick the kids up and go home. We are out of the house from about 7:30 until 5:30. This does not leave a ton of time to grocery shop.

I have only used clicklist and although my order isn’t always perfect, I love it. It allows me to leave the kids in the car. I don’t have to take the three year old and infant into the store. This is a miracle. 

Organization/Planning

I love planning vacations. I love planning fun weekends with the kids. I do not like planning the day to day schedule. Between work, pumping (yes, pumping), appointments and somewhat of a social life, our day to day needs to be planned and organized. 

A few things that have helped me is that I have literally every single thing ready the night before. This includes all my pumping equipment, my daughters bottles, my sons clothes (and mine) all ready the night before. This allows me to just get up and get ready to get out the door.

I keep a large weekly calendar in the kitchen by the door. This way my husband can’t miss it and can see what we have going for the week. 

I also plan and schedule every single pumping session at work. I try and time this with the time that her daycare will be feeding her the bottles. This works for me. 

 

Support System

No joke. This is the most important of them all. My husband and I are SO incredibly lucky to have such wonderful parents. They have made this transition a lot easier on us. 

My parents watch my daughter on Tuesdays and along with that have been picking up my son from daycare that day. My mother in law has been picking up my son on Mondays and this is a huge help. 

Both kids go to two different daycares so I am in the car after work for about an hour and a half. By them picking up my son it saves me so much time. It’s so wonderful. 

Another important part of my support system is the texts and calls from friends. I know I have cried, complained and gone out of my mind. I appreciate you all listening.

Having a positive mindset

I know many of you might think this sounds lame, but this is SO key to having a good week. If you start your week without this your entire week will be ruined. I know. I’ve gone into Monday morning with an awful attitude and it changed my whole week.

I get it. Sometimes it’s really hard to stay positive in the AM. You have been up with your baby, your toddler and dog (just me?). 

Time to yourself

This one actually took me a good long while to actually understand. Not until recently was I giving myself any time after the kids went to bed. Once they went to bed I was instantly in as well. Sometimes this is still the case, but you quickly realize that this is your only alone time. Period. 

I have been staying up and watching some TV or reading or, honestly, just doing nothing at all. 

My house is not always clean and clutter free. I am not always put together like I was before kids. Being a working mom is HARD. You are constantly thinking about your kids during work and work when you’re with your kids. It’s hard to turn either off. 

I am so very lucky to have a husband, family and friends that help and support me. Also, this mom community in which we started. It gives both Erin and I an outlet to learn, discuss, complain and relish in the joys of motherhood. 

Let me know if you have any great tips or tricks to make the work week a little easier!

#Momguilt Part Two – The Second Child

So awhile back I wrote a blog about #Momguilt. Little did I know that it only gets TEN TIMES worse when you add a second child into the mix.

The same feelings of guilt are still there.

The guilt of …

working

making a healthy dinner

when I lose my patience

when I’m distracted by something else *phone*

that I allow TV and tablet

Now there are even more and a lot of them have to do with my attention and how I can evenly divide it. I would, ideally, like all aspects of my life to feel most important.

• My children. This is the area where I have the most guilt.
  1. My son. I feel guilty that I have literally changed my son’s life in a drastic (but beautiful) way. When my attention is on him I am distracted by his sister and her needs. I know that I don’t give myself credit, but it’s hard.
  2. My daughter. Although she gets attention – (just finished up a wonderful 12 week maternity with her) it’s very different from what Ben got when he was a baby and I feel guilty about that. She really will never get my FULL attention because she is the second child.

• 

• 

• 

• My husband. Although it isn’t said and completely fine – I know that my husband is the one who gets the shaft completely. Our lives have taken a turn from the two of us, to the three of us, to now, the four of us. I am sure it will get better, but right now this mama goes to bed right when the baby does which gives us almost zero time together.

• My Work Life. Although I just started work I am already feeling guilty. When you don’t have kids your work is basically your baby (right? Am I the only one?). I know that I will get into a groove again and it will just take time. Why do we think things should just happen instantly?!

• Daycare guilt. This is geared more toward my three month old. My son (three years old) thrives at his daycare. There is a constant pressure on my chest about leaving my three month old with others. The guilt I have about going to work and not being with my children is great.

Luckily, I have an amazing husband, family and friends who make me feel like I am doing it all and doing it with grace. We can’t be perfect. No one is.

Now, please pass me a glass of wine.

The Struggles of Going Back to Work

As I write this I have about four more weeks before I have to go back to my full time job. Yep. Full-time job. That sounds crazy, right? I have a *newborn* and a toddler so that surely is my full-time job. RIGHT!? I am screaming this because I am not quite sure how I am going to do it all.

Why, as a society, have we not gotten better about how we treat working moms? Why is everything still going to be expected of us when we go back to work?

Let me tell you right now – maternity is NOT a vacation. It’s not 12 weeks where the moms get to party and live it up. It is quite literally the hardest job you can imagine.

While your body (and mind) are healing from pushing a baby out you are taking care of a newborn and most likely other children. You are on call every minute of every single day.

Besides taking care of your children you also feel like you have to cook, clean, shop and maintain everything around the household. You should have to be the one to do it all, right? That’s what society tells us.

Going back to a full-time job and having a full-time job at home doesn’t seem possible and I am fearing it.

I am fearing leaving my three month old daughter with complete strangers.

I am fearing how my nights will look when trying to get everything ready for the next day.

I am fearing the new morning routine. Trying to get a toddler and newborn out of the house.

I am fearing dinners and how on earth they are going to get made.

I am fearing how any household task is going to get done.

I am fearing getting back into the groove at work and finding my stride again.

I am fearing all the breaks I will need to take to pump.

I am fearing not breastfeeding my daughter whenever she needs it and instead having a stranger give her the pumped milk (this one also makes me incredibly sad).

So, there you have it, I am a scared and I know I’m not the only one that has these thoughts. I know mothers everywhere are thinking the same things and more. I just wish we would be able to do something about it and stay home with our babies a little longer.

One can dream…

How do you know you’re done having kids?

This question has been playing in my mind over and over again since I had my second baby. She is only seven weeks old, but I’ve had a good amount of time to think (because of the measles outbreak in my home town I’m afraid to go anywhere).

I’ve always thought I would be done at two. I have a boy and a girl and I feel like that’s perfect for our family. A family of four sounds good. There are two of us and two of them. Financially it makes sense. We will still live our life how we normally do and take vacations every year. It makes sense.

My baby boy. The first born. It was easy to know I wanted one more after him!

So if I think all that WHY can’t I get that nagging voice out of my head that says ‘well, maybe…’. There are pros and cons to everything and I know that, for my family, the pros of two are better.

My second born. This time it’s a little harder to make that call.

How did you know? How did you know that you were done having kids? I didn’t take the time to enjoy my last pregnancy and I wish I had since it might be my last. That’s so hard to think of though, right? I won’t feel the kicks again? Or the moment they lay your baby on your chest?

Tell me. How did you know? Did you go through a mourning process?

• 

• Cece

• 

• Cece

• 

• Ben

A Birth Story: Why My Husband wasn’t in the Delivery Room

As I sit here in the middle of the night unable to sleep, although I desperately need to with a newborn and toddler, I instead think of the craziness the last week and a half brought.

I always enjoyed reading birth stories when I was first pregnant and I thought that maybe sharing mine would do some good. I have heard it all. From horror stories to blissful ness and everything in between – no birth story is the same. My sons birth story was pretty average. I labored at home until I couldn’t walk and went to the hospital. We were there for about four hours and he came into the world. It was a beautiful moment with my husband.

This time around was a bit different. It happened on the day my 37 week appointment was. It was my first ‘check’ and I was so excited to see if little Cece was moving along at all. My obgyn (who is amazing) checked me and I was only about 1 cm along (nothing). She told me it was a good start and sent me on my way.

• 

• 

• 

I went to work and thought nothing of it until a couple hours later. I was cramping and I remember telling my boss that it had to be because of the check. This is totally normal, right?!

I picked Ben up from daycare and couldn’t walk the full way down the stairs. I again figured it was just cramping from the check that morning.

When I got home I texted my husband to find out if he was going to be late or not and that I was ‘feeling weird’. He came home and I went straight to bed. I just couldn’t sleep. I had to keep moving. It was a weird feeling that just NEVER stopped. I was pacing the floors until around midnight when I told Adam that I think I needed to go to the hospital. I didn’t think I was really in labor so we packed up our son and headed to labor and delivery.

They checked me when I got there and I was about 3 cm dilated. They wanted to keep me for a little while before either giving me a room or sending me home. The reason for keeping me? It was a nonstop contraction and they were worried about the baby. Literally – non stop. The most of a break I received (the nurses said) was about 20 seconds. They told me they wanted to watch the baby for awhile and would be back in an hour.

Well, about 30 minutes later they came in and said they didn’t think the baby was liking this nonstop contraction and wanted to check me again. Well, this time I was a five. I got sent to a room ASAP!! The time I got to my room was around 1:30 am (Cece was born at 2:09).

At this point Ben was not allowed in the labor/delivery room so Adam had to wait in the waiting room with him until my parents arrived. I got to my room and promptly asked for some drugs. They came. They missed. They did it again. This was the worst. Not having a break from a contraction to get an epidural is very hard. Thank goodness for my labor and delivery nurse. The unsung hero’s I tell you! She was my nurse, my doctor and my ‘Adam’ throughout the whole process.

I never got checked again. My doctor said she would be back in a couple of hours and to try and get some rest. My nurse told me she was going to step out to tell my husband how things were going. Before leaving she asked if I needed anything.

I told her I had to poop.

She looked at me and said she wanted to check me really quick. That’s when all hell broke loose. She said the head was coming out and to not push. She called the front desk for someone to tell Adam and after that she called my doctor.

While on the phone with the doctor (phone in one hand) I told her the baby was coming. My nurse literally caught my baby while she was on the phone trying to get someone in. Seconds later six people run into the room and couldn’t believe that the baby was out.

Cecelia was born at 2:09 am. About forty minutes after I got to my room.

In the meantime Adam is rushing to my room (which he was never in before) and stops short because he hears a baby crying. He thought ‘no way I’m going in that room – it can’t be the right room’. He went back to the front and they assured him to go go go.

He walked into the room with his daughter on my chest. My parents had just gotten to the hospital and he had no idea what was happening to me. What a scary thing for him.

I am lucky that things happened fast, but it also wasn’t awesome. The drugs didn’t work (since they were given about ten minutes prior to her coming out) and I didn’t get the antibiotics needed for group B (which I tested positive for). We had to stay in the hospital for 48 hours before we could be released so that they could watch for any signs that group B made it to her.

I really shutter to think what would have happened if I decided to ignore what I was feeling and stay home a little longer. I truly believe that we would have been on the news for having a car baby on the way to the hospital. Ladies! This is a lesson. Always. I mean ALWAYS listen to your body.

One thing that was kinda nice was that Ben was there and he was literally the first person (other than Adam and I) to see his sister. Yes, it was around 3:00 in the morning, but it couldn’t have been more special. Luckily we have it all recorded to show them when they’re older!

We are very lucky that things went well and the baby was in the right position.

Now is the time for healing. Now is the time for loving. Now is the time to *try and get some rest*.

Mom Life – Pregnancy with a Toddler

Let me tell you something. It was about four years ago now when I was having one might call ‘the perfect pregnancy’. I felt great, I thought I looked great and I was anticipating this little boys arrival with many rests and naps.

Pregnancy the first go around means a photo every week!

Anyone I talked to I would tell how wonderful pregnancy can be and how I would do it ten times over. We had some scares in terms of blood work, but the pregnancy itself was great.

My labor was much of the same. I started feeling contractions in the morning (I had extremely bad cramps growing up so it almost felt like I was used to this) and didn’t go to the hospital until midnight. My son was born about four hours later.

Let’s fast forward three years later. Pregnant with my second little one is extremely different. The reason? My guess is the toddler that is currently hanging on my arm begging for chocolate milk while also requesting that I make dinner and build him his new dresser.

Being pregnant with a toddler is not for the weak. I repeat. NOT FOR THE WEAK. You have to go into it KNOWING that it will not be the same. You have a little person that doesn’t understand limitations and demands attention. You would *almost* forget that you were pregnant if it wasn’t for all those wonderful symptoms and the fact that you start showing extremely early (I mean, someone asked if I was pregnant when I was only 13 weeks)!

Last week my pregnancy app had a little note saying ‘take time for yourself, mama. Go get a manicure or go take a nap’. This note literally made me cry (literally). Why? Why would you tease a mother that clearly cannot take the time to do that (but desperately wants to)?!

On top of all this you build in the total mom guilt of bringing such a big change to your first born. My son seems to be doing OK with everything right now, but we clearly know that things will be different. I will never forget my mom telling me that she felt that as soon as my oldest brother came into the hospital room to visit her second born – things changed. Right then and there the relationship changed.

I know we are in for a change. I am not sure I am completely ready for it, but I know how completely blessed I am to have it.

Pregnancy is hard and motherhood is harder. The thing I appreciate the most right now is my mom friends and family. The friends and family I can easily talk to about the ups and downs of motherhood.

I enjoy my nieces and nephews and I love them like my own (whether they are by blood or friendship). This season of life that we are all going through is beautiful so please, spam me with photos of your children, cry with me when you feel overwhelmed and let’s feel joy for each other when an accomplishment is made.

This is life for all of us right now and although it’s not perfect, it’s pretty great.

Toys Vs. Activities – What to Get for Christmas?

I’ve done them both and I think I have the answer.

A couple of years ago (when I wasn’t pregnant) I gave my nieces the gift of an activity with me. This was in place of the toy or gift or gift card that they were asking for. 

The activities were based upon what I thought each girl would like. Some of the time it was a broadway show at The Fox Theater. Another time I took one niece to a kids Painting With a Twist. From shows to art classes to aquariums and crocheting – I was willing to try it all. 

It was a day and night (they all slept over as well) of non-stop niece action. It was incredibly valuable to not only them, but also myself. I learned so much more about them as individuals because it was one on one and not with their sisters. 

What I learned:

1. Although actual presents might be more fun to open, the anticipation of the “Auntie Date” far outweighs it. 
2. This is not only for the child. It’s for you and the parents of the child, too. Put the phone down and be ‘present’ to the child. They notice everything.
3. Have a conversation with them during the date. Not just your ‘how’s school’ and such. Ask meaningful questions and you will be surprised at the answers you get back.
4. Aim for a certain age. I have not done this with my youngest niece or nephew yet. I think it makes a little more sense to wait until they can remember it.
5. Be a kid during the date. Do things that you might not usually do. Have fun and show that fun to the child (whether your own or not).

These dates have been priceless and I cannot wait to start doing them again when I am not so pregnant. This year birthday and Christmas gifts were just that – gifts. But I am hoping to bring this back again soon.

So when deciding what to get, try and think out of the box. Think of a somewhere – not a wrapped box. They will forever remember the memory of the event instead of what was wrapped inside a little box.